robglazebrook.com

During “Remember the Titans”:

Gerry Bertier is lying in bed, paralyzed, following an automobile accident.

Julius, to Gerry: You can’t be hurt. You’re Superman.

Me, to Justin: That’s pretty ironic, isn’t it? You know, considering Superman’s condition and all.

Justin, to Me: It turns out Superman has two weaknesses: Kryptonite and spinal injuries.

—

During “Tombstone”:

Wyatt Earp to his brother Virgil: In all my time working those cow towns I was involved in one gunfight, just one. But a man lost his life, and I took it.

Me, to Justin: And now I have two.

My grades for my last semester as an undergrad are as follows:

Biol 123     B
Cl St 376b   B+
Engl 418     A
Soc 219      A

That gives me a semester GPA of 3.58, which is significant in two ways. One, my transcript shows this to be my worst semester in the last eight, counting summers. Two, it’s still good enough to make the Dean’s list. :)

I still think I’m sorta proud of my grades this semester, especially considering the hell I was going through in all things extra-curricular. I was still able to focus when it counted, and that makes me feel good.

For those counting, this semester brings my final cumulative undergraduate GPA to 3.28, which is nothing to sneeze at or otherwise project bodily fluids towards. I’m okay with a 3.28, considering. Justin and I both added add that final word, considering, to the sentence when we said it aloud. We both know the depth and scope of the hole I dug for myself my first three or four semesters here. *g*

Oh, and for those of you who were worried that my new digs would interfere with my schoolin’ (*cough*mom*cough*), I don’t think you have anything to worry about. Justin and Mark both made the Dean’s list with GPA’s higher than mine: 3.75 and 3.59, respectively. JJ’s already left for Texas, so I can’t check with him.

—–

I’ll be camping this weekend with the folks, grandfolks, and a sibling or so at the Des Moines West KOA, so please don’t freak out when I don’t post for the next couple of days, m-kay? *g* Seeing as how it’s supposed to be cold and rainy all weekend and this campgound (or Kampground, for the anally-inclined noun rapists out there) doesn’t allow fires for whatever reason, I’m going to have to figure out alternative methods for keeping myself warm. Body-warming beverages, perhaps? You know, like coffee or hot chocolate.

See y’all on the flip side.

Happy Mother’s Day, to the best mom I’ve ever had. I love you like a sister that gave birth to her brother. In retaliation thanks for all that you’ve done to me given me, I drew you this picture. As you all can see, my mom is where I got my charming good looks. She’s also the source of a hearty helping of my sense of humor, so what better way to celebrate? We’re not naked; we’re wearing flesh-colored jumpsuits. And, apparently, corsets. That wasn’t our car, so don’t worry!

Love you, mom. I’ll see you in a week, assuming gas prices haven’t risen much more. :)

Yup, I’m still in a weird mood. Which isn’t helping me study for my Sociology final one bit, I might add. Luckily, this isn’t the first time I’ve been in a mood like this (it’s actually a pretty frequent occurance, I just never bother to write about it), and my Soc notes are littered with strange references that keep studying interesting.

My notes included the following statements:

• Informed consent (It’s a bitch).
• Note: A lot of Mormon polygamists are fat.
• Note: Polygamists become gods.
• Significance: Buddha was a pimp daddy.
• Monogamy - 1 partner per life
• Note to self: Girl in middle doesn’t think girls like boys.
• Warfare and polygyny: When guys die, women get horny.
• Cupid - Aphrodite’s right hand winged dude.
• Paper due Thursday, dummy.
• Michael Jordan likes McDonald’s.
• Sternberg’s triangular view of love (good ol’ Sternberg):
• Intimacy - Peeing with the door open
• Passion - When the moon hits your eye
• Commitment - It’s about maintenance.
• Conditions for the development of love:
• Social conditions - beer availability.
• Psychological conditions - inebriation.
• Physiological and cognitive conditions - being horny.
• Problems associated with love
• Simultaneous love (no shit)
• Abusive or unfullfilling love relationships - people are pies, battery is one piece
• Lack of perceived alternatives - you are the most beautiful person who will sleep with me
• Dating and Mate selection - the history of courtship:
• Bundling - couples were permitted to court in bed
• Calling - “Calling card”
• Dating - have her home by 10
• Hook-up - couples court in bed again
• Internet Dating - http://www.hoochie.com
• 1st gen of web kids are now geeky adults
• Note: personal ads get you sex.
• Uglies marry (and reproduce).
• Women lie for safety. Guys are just dicks.
• Equity theory:
• If’n you’re roughly the same hotness, that’s good.
• Introverts like introverts (when they notice one another).
• Dyslexics untie! (homogamy rules)
• Does this person go with my dress?
• Average wedding cost: $18,947.34. The moral: elope in a new car instead.
• Reasons to have children:
• Live vicariously.
• Lawn won’t mow itself.
• Daddy’s little tax break.
• Like a dog, but you don’t have to tie ‘em up.
• It’s expensive to tame midgets.
• Excuse to go to Disneyland.
• Benefits of parenthood: adult status - I’m a big boy, look what I can do.
• Can’t see the abusive forest for all the damn trees.
• Cupcake of doom! (Boom jimmies).
• I’m pacman.

In case anyone here feels morally obligated to get me something to celebrate my college graduation (and you all probably should), I’ve updated a couple of my wishlists:

Amazon.com - I even ranked some of the stuff. Some of it is practical (like the Chicago Manual of Style), most of it is just fun (like the Real Genius DVD).

ThinkGeek - I haven’t done much updating yet, but their selection doesn’t much change, either.

Newegg - The best hardware store on the planet. If anyone feels like helping me update my computer, I’d be obliged. :)

Then again, cash is always good, too. It is, in fact, everywhere I want to be. If you have a large check you were just itchin’ to send my way, my new address is:

Rob Glazebrook <– me
525 6th Street
Ames, IA 50010

Some of you, I’ll be seeing in ten days or so for my graduation party/camping trip/food-on-a-stick-buffet (see my mom’s website for further details). The rest of you just aren’t cool. So if you wanna be cool, you’d better be camping next weekend. Near me. Unless it’s raining or cold, in which case I’m ditching you-all and heading back to Ames to party. :)

Can you tell the sort of mood I’m in today?