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I would like to formally announce to the blogosphere that I have invented the world’s greatest contraction! Behold:
I’d'nt’ve - I would not have.
Example: I’d'nt’ve done that were I you…
Brilliant! The beauty is, it contains only contractions what exist elsewhere, such that those yet ignorant should still be able to divine its meaning. I’m sure everyone can appreciate a self-illuminating contraction.
I’m not sure all self-illuminating contractions would work quite so well, though. Consider:
Could’nt’d'nt’ve - Could not, would not have.
Example: I could’nt’d'nt’ve done that!
While this would certainly be useful for those times where one needs to explicitly explain the complete and utter impossibility of some task or accusation set forth (on both rational and ethical grounds), I think it might be a little cumbersome yet.